Santa Claus has gone from “you better watch out, you better not cry” to “f*ck around and find out.” At least this Santa wasn’t a jerkface making a little boy cry. Also, the gun in question is most definitely NOT a Nerf. We go now to a California mall. Lots of customers were inside getting their holiday shopping on. Unbeknownst to them, three nogoodniks were in the parking lot doing some holiday shopping of their own — something with four wheels and no monthly payments. That’s when they discovered they were about to have a very bad day. This mall is patrolled by St. Nick and his trusty sidekick Tipsy McFluffytoes. Tipsy appears to have a concealed carry license.
Before the grinch fact-checkers get their hands on this, I can’t confirm the elf’s name. But I played around with a name generator, and it sounded magical. Have some Christmas spirit! Also from the local NBC Affiliate, there was more to this Santa Claus and companion than met the eye:
Det. Paul Miranda was one of several Riverside police officers working undercover Thursday at Target in the Canyon Springs Shopping Center.
“We worked inside the store, identified shoplifters and when they split the scene, Santa was there to take them into custody,” Miranda said.
Santa is a detective and his trusty sidekick elf, an officer. Both jumped into action when Miranda spotted a car being stolen from the parking lot as two other men ran from the scene.
The real hero in this story is the guy yelling “Get ’em, Santa” from behind his trusty smartphone. Had it not been for him, we’d have no idea this story took place. Be honest, seeing Santa blockbuster suplex a perp put a smile on your face. Find the joy in the little things this Chrstmas season!
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EXCLUSIVE: Crowder Saves Christmas from Woke Santa Who Made Boy CRY! | Louder With Crowderyoutu.be